The loving-kindness exercise was a difficult one for me since I have built a wall of protection regarding my feelings for my husband due to the resentments that I feel. As I wrote in my reflection of the loving-kindness exercise, I was unable to focus on the love that I have for my husband because I currently feel more like his caregiver instead of his wife. I feel more like his caregiver because I was thrown into the role of his full-time caregiver four and a half years ago. As a result of this, this exercise was frustrating for me and when I was done with it I did not feel like it benefited me at all.
However, the subtle mind exercise was easier for me. This exercise is what I need to concentrate on since my mind is full of unnecessary chatter. Lately, I find that I have so much chatter going on in my mind that I have difficulty with focus. During this exercise, I found that I had moments of quiet within my mind though my mind did wander at times. However, as I focused on my breathing I was able to calm my mind. After going through this exercise, I felt refreshed and energized; a sense of renewal.
Debra
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